IoW/PCW presents......

[mrslegendaryken]

Outside of a seedy strip club. A crack whore chewing gum, dressed in a bikini and swinging a purse is on one side of a door, huge black guy in full tuxedo and shades is on the other.

Caption:

WPW HEADQUARTERS, OKEECHOBEE, FLA.

The camera suddenly fast forwards through the door.......past the 70 year old woman smoking a cigarette through scarlet lips while she takes the cash at the door.......past the dingy stage where someone who looks like Tina Bee gyrates pitifully, 2 quarters sticking out from her garter belt.....through the grubby curtain that leads to the dressing room.....straight through the dressing room where what can only be a ladyboy shaves his/her legs.....through another door marked 'Carlos Gonzales'.......and eventually stopping at a desk on which the Jokester lies, his chest adorned with nipple tassels. He speaks: The Jokester............is here.

His entrance music, 'I am the Jokester' plays until he switches off the decrepit old cassette machine from which the music blares.

Yes. For those who do not know me..........em.......hello. I'm the Jokester. For those that do know me, I'm sorry and I promise I'll never do that again.
Well, as you'll realise by now, I'm a proud WPW employee, all dressed up and rarin' to go........but no-one to fight with. Unless...........WPW's very own unbeaten man of mystery, X-P*c is interested in a little bit of Grunt 'n' Groan. I see that you've thrown out an open challenge, or rather that prehistoric dinosaur you tout around as your manager has. Well, I'll accept that challenge as I think it's about time that the real story behind 'legendaryken' was exposed. Oh yes, I know a few things about the man that they couldn't carbon date, a few things that he would rather keep quiet. So, Mr. P*c-Man, I rather think you ought to accept my challenge, otherwise things could get messy.......very very messy. I'll be seeing you.......soon. Bet on it.

The Jokester switches back on the cassette machine. This time it plays maniacal laughter ripped from some old 'Mad Professor' movie.
The Jokester mumbles to himself.: Strange.....I thought it was a Justin Timberlake track next. Need to get that fixed.

The fast forward camera retreats again past the scenes as before, finishing with the Dream handing over a ten dollar bill to the crack whore as she wipes her lips with the back of her hand.
Cut.

[legendaryken]

The camera shows a nervous looking X-P*c behind the counter in what looks like a seedy sex shop. Forget 'Hustler', this is far.....far worse. Dog eared magazines show women doing interesting things with.......well......dog ears. A few DVDs are seen in a discount basket. One appears to have Sophie Cassius on the front. Can't be, surely?
X-P*c spots the camera and raises a finger as if to make a point in reply to the Jokester promo which is playing on the small black and white TV propped up on the counter.
legendaryken suddenly appears and switches off the TV. He speaks:

Well,well,well,well. If it isn't the funny man from now deceased wrestling federation, PCW. Did they finally see through the joke then?
And now you have the temerity to come here......to the very home of the greatest wrestler alive today, X-P*c.

X-P*c looks around the shop quizically before realising his name has been mentioned. He crotch chops and makes an angry face at the camera.

Well, Mr Jokester. X-P*c will be delighted to accept your challenge....

X-P*c looks a little worried over legendaryken's shoulder and tries to intervene, but legendaryken continues.

In fact, so delighted, and so confident that he has a little proposition to put to you.
You see, X-P*c doesn't like you.
(X-P*c snarls silently)
In fact, he doesn't like you at all........so much so that he doesn't want you in WPW, so what do you say to the idea that we make this a 'This Town Ain't Big Enough for the Both of Us' match.
You heard me. Winner stays and goes on to greater glory..........loser resigns their contract and is never seen again on WPW programming. How does that sound, Mr Hollow Laughter?
X-P*c by now is thoroughly discontented and is trying to attract legendaryken's attention to suggest some other type of match.
Give it some thought and I'll have words with my very good friend, Carlos Gonzales. You see, there's just not enough room for the sophisticated wit of the unbeaten X-P*c and the sub-toilet humor of the Jokester, current WPW record 0 and 1. So, Jokester, give mrslegendaryken my love. It's probably in one of these discarded condoms you keep in those amazing pockets of yours.
Hello.....and Goodbye.

[mrslegendaryken]

A solitary figure stands in the centre of a deserted dirt track stadium. A rusted monster truck is at one side, but the surrounding spectator areas are completely empty.
Sudden zoom all the way down to the isolated figure. It is the Jokester.

Recognize it, X-P*c? Yeah, it's where you'll be meeting your destiny this Tuesday on TNT. Obviously there'll be a wrestling ring here..........and maybe a few people might turn up now they know that the Jokester will be appearing.......but it's where you'll be taking your bow......horrific internal injuries permitting.
I accept, legendaryken. I accept your pathetic attempt to intimidate me. I accept the minuscule possibility of me losing my WPW contract and I accept that the final destiny of X-P*c's career will be placed in my hands.
But............I cannot remain silent.........I cannot allow what I know about legendaryken to remain unsaid. Win...........or lose.........I shall reveal your secret to the wrestling public. The only other option for you would be my premature death or permanent incapacity. Think your boy could do that?

Jokester ends with a low laugh and a mock crotch chop, but unfortunately has not mastered the technique and thumps himself in the groin. Some sweary words escape his lips as the camera shot fades.