Does anyone masturbate

[Jeff HBK Hardy V.2]

No seriously does anyone actually do so for pleasure? I don't and never will, its against the bible and I also think its as gross as hell.

[Wilse]

Hmmm........interesting.....subject.......

I think it's a bit personal for anyone to say, I think the only people who are gonna answer would be the people who say no like you. It's sorta embarassing to tell anyone about anything you do at night, whether it's with a girl or by yourself, let alone tell people on the internet half way around the world. I guess this is sorta up to anyone to decide whether they want to answer or not, but don't count on people to feel enthusiastic about this....

BTW I don't really wanna answer whethe rI do or not, so I'll let you think whatever you want to think and let myself know the truth k?

And also Jeff, You come across as the sorta person who would :p j/k man.
(My Fellow F.A.R.T)

[Gravedigger]

No seriously does anyone actually do so for pleasure? I don't and never will, its against the bible and I also think its as gross as hell.
NEVER WILL? Dude, you're lying. Everyone has experimented with that. Everyone who has been through puberty has tried it, especially guys, so don't lie.

This post just seems like an attempt to try and make yourself look better than everyone, but hey...whatever floats your boat, man.

[Peoples King]

I bet 20quid that he was pulling the chicken while making this post. Whats to say Jesus didnt have a tug when he was 13? The bible skips most of his life so you actually dont know what he was like.

The only person that qould make a thread about this is a sick freak who wishes to judge other people.

Oh and to answer your question. Yes I do. I call those special times "King Times".

[james_aust]

This thread is rude and unnessacary. :D

[Epitaph]

seeing as PK said he does , Then im stepping forward and saying that i do. As GD said though , Every one has experimented with it!

[Wilse]

Whats the point when sooner or later there will be a girl getting me there anyway ;)

Ok, I haven't YET, I guess cause sometimes I have a certain girl here to get me there :eek: BTW that doesn't mean I've gone ALL the way....not yet and not for a while, like I said in some chat, not until it's legal, but where in that law did it say about anything else? :p Maybe some time when she's gone for a while and I miss her but that hasn't happened yet.

BTW I am saying this now since people are starting to say whether they do or not, I guess if they qare comfortable doing it, then I should be too.....

[Epitaph]

Just out of curiosity, You Rekon any girls will be reading this thread and Ansewer ?

[Gravedigger]

Just out of curiosity, You Rekon any girls will be reading this thread and Ansewer ?
I doubt it. Girls really don't reveal things like this.

[Epitaph]

I doubt it. Girls really don't reveal things like this.

Dam...So why are me and PK telling every one?!

True Story , a ex of mine did it on the Ph.....Never mind

[The Pez]

No seriously does anyone actually do so for pleasure? I don't and never will, its against the bible and I also think its as gross as hell.If people followed everything in the Bible.....then the world would be no fun. (I don't mean to start a religious argument, but it's true!)

Saying you don't masterbate is like saying you don't watch TV. Unless you're an Amish person, then you watch TV. Everyone does it!

Jeff, I really don't understand why you made this thread?!

[Drunkacho]

No seriously does anyone actually do so for pleasure?

Unless you donate sperm regularly, what the hell else are you gonna beat off for?


I don't and never will, its against the bible and I also think its as gross as hell.

Good for you! Personally, I couldn't care if it's against the bible or not, big whoop.

Here's a hint, it's not gross if you've got some kleenex at hand. :winkok:

[Superman33]

Hmmmmm.........

I don't really know what to think about thread, but will say that I've done it before.

*Goes to whack off like a mad man*

PS Jeff, why would you make a thread about it if you don't do it?

[Sunshine]

hmm...i dont need to. I can get some whenever i want! I have a phonebook of 1000's of prostitutes for $1!

[Wrestlingmann]

Yes i do. 3 times a day after meals.

[Jeff HBK Hardy V.2]

NEVER WILL? Dude, you're lying. Everyone has experimented with that. Everyone who has been through puberty has tried it, especially guys, so don't lie.

This post just seems like an attempt to try and make yourself look better than everyone, but hey...whatever floats your boat, man.


I'm not trying to start somthing GD but I don't feel the need to prove that I'm better than anyone over the net to people I can't see.

Supes I just want to see people's reactions because over here in Australia we call many people wankers(Y2J at global warning was funny) and its an insult so its bad.

And PK, I have never experimented with myself. I don't even want to have sex untill marriage.

LOL at Drunkychoo

[The Great One]

True Story , a ex of mine did it on the Ph.....Never mind

College toilets, the only place to get heads.

[Peoples King]

Wheres Rachel when you need her? She'd get all of us riled up if she took a peak at this thread.

I just thought. Has it occured to anyone that Jeff maybe hasnt hit the puberty yet? Think about it

Edit: Jeff did I ever tell you to experiment? Now if your trying to come on to me there are other avenues to go down. But Im sorry Jeff, Im straight and you'd be shot down.

BTW People everywhere call people wankers. People also call people ****ers. Savy?

[Gravedigger]

I'm not trying to start somthing GD but I don't feel the need to prove that I'm better than anyone over the net to people I can't see.
Well, looking at your past history with discussions you usually do try and make yourself look better. And saying you did it just to see people's reactions is basically proving my assumption right. You wanna see if other people do it so you can then judge them.


And PK, I have never experimented with myself. I don't even want to have sex untill marriage.
I want to wait to have sex until I'm married, too. Doesn't mean I'm afraid to admit I've experimented before. But I agree with PK, I guess you just haven't gone through puberty yet because every guy does it during puberty. Either that or you're a really really really feminine person. And I don't mean homosexual, so don't confuse my words.

[Peoples King]

It happens like this. One day your just there minding your own business. Your asleep and everything seems dandy. But its not! Everything infact is randy. You wake up and your jocks are a mess with this sticky fluid you havent seen before, unless of course you were a regular at Father Murphy's masses. Anyway you dont know what this is. Smells damp, maybe aliens attacked you during the night? But no. Think back to those sex education classes...... OMG thats Sperm!

So for the next month or so you are content to just no that your scrotal sack is full with little people. Then however you think to yourself, "I wonder what its like to ***." So one night while your flicking chanels you stumble across some porno. Mr Johnson begins to grow and you look at him. You think, "Maybe if I tug it for a little bit........ just to see what its like". You let your pants down a bit and grab it, lightly at first because you havent tried this sorta thing. You slowly begin to rub your closed hand up and down. Jenna Jameson is moaning on the screen and talking about how wet she is.

You begin to pick up momentum, your eyes grow with excitment. Your little soldier standing to attention. After a while you begin to get a feeling. "Uuuuuuuuggggggggh! Ugh!" Boom! 200 milion sperm shoot up out of your penis, hitting your chest and dripping down to your naval. You breath in out, satisfied in the knowledge that you are a man. Your work here is done. But then mum and dad walk in and Im afraid from here on, your on your own.

Thats what will happen to Jeff, thats what will happen to you.

[Drunkacho]

Speaking from past experience are we King? :chuckles:


So you'd never whack off Jeff, but what if your wife, (after you get married) didn't give you any for like a year?!

I've heard of sexual tension but that would take the piss...

[Peoples King]

Im quite proud of that last piece Drunky. I think I may have gotten Jeff excited though.

[Drunkacho]

Im quite proud of that last piece Drunky. I think I may have gotten Jeff excited though.

Maybe you could have your own Agony Uncle column in some newspaper?

I can picture it now...


Dearest King,

I'm a girl of 19 and over the past 6 months I've been having the most mindblowing sex with a man who is 40 years my senior. My parents and friends strongly disagree with the whole arrangement between us two because of the massive age gap. But the chemistry and bond that we share is so immense they just can't imagine what it feels like to be in my position. They've even went so far to threaten to disown me if I don't call this off.

I love this man more than anything in the world, but I can't risk losing my family. What should I do?

How bout that eh? :chuckles:

[Duff]

I'm 21 years old! What do you think? Ive been masturbating for ten years and i always will, married or not. Sure, it isn't as good as sex, but its still damn fun. I have no problem disclosing this inforamtion, as i assume anyone would be able to guess it anyway. Judge me if you will, but i'm a 21- yr old guy, i need to release things sometimes. BTW GD,old men like you shouldn't be masturbating, that's just sick! lol

What is the point of this thread? Surley there are teen puberty forums where you can discuss this sort of thing.

[Peoples King]

Dearest King,

I'm a girl of 19 and over the past 6 months I've been having the most mindblowing sex with a man who is 40 years my senior. My parents and friends strongly disagree with the whole arrangement between us two because of the massive age gap. But the chemistry and bond that we share is so immense they just can't imagine what it feels like to be in my position. They've even went so far to threaten to disown me if I don't call this off.

I love this man more than anything in the world, but I can't risk losing my family. What should I do?

Dear 19 year old hotty,

Here is what I think you should do. Obviously you are one hot biznitch that would make a man masturbate at the drop of their pants. Otherwise this sick old freak wouldnt be doing this way, that way and the other way.

You dont love this man. He just has a huge penis and pleasure you in ways othermen cant. Othermen except me. Trust me there isnt a man that can blow your mind in bed like me. And hey Im not some sick, wrinkly old git. Im a god. Think about it. His face has more wrinkles then his ball sack. Drop him and come try a King sized.................

Then again though, I've just have a thought. You could be some dumb hick from god knows where, who's mother is their first cousin. Hell this old fossel maybe your redneck Uncle Buck who used to bring you out to the woods for some........ deep fishing. Damn I knew it was too good to be true. So dumb imbred hick girl, here is my advice for you. Find a gun, find a tower and then shoot every single one of the cracker spawn your family sent out into the world. After that turn the gun on yourself.

Sincerely,
King

[Gravedigger]

BTW GD,old men like you shouldn't be masturbating, that's just sick! lol
Somebody has a stinkie diaper...

[wwechick1982]

BTW and IMO, you all are Sick F-R-E-A-K-S! ;)

BTW King, I thought I could get away from this thread without my name being mentioned! Thanks Alot! :(

[Epitaph]

BTW and IMO, you all are Sick F-R-E-A-K-S! ;)

BTW King, I thought I could get away from this thread without my name being mentioned! Thanks Alot! :(

That we are sick freaks. King it's quite scary how you think up things like your Aunt Coloum's. I For one would pay to read your **** :)

LOL Nice to see you actually post in this thread rachel..

[Peoples King]

Enough about you Rachel! You always hog the spotlight with those damn legs! Its King time now. So Agony Uncle. You think I could do it? I mean I think that last piece of advice was pure brilliance.

[Epitaph]

That it was King , That it was. Im expecting the Suicide rate to hit a all time high

[Peoples King]

Thank you Gary. You appreciate true art when you see it. Unlike that Rachel person. Anyone else notice that she didnt answer the question. Hmmmmmm Rachel, whats that about? :winkok:

[Epitaph]

Thank you Gary. You appreciate true art when you see it. Unlike that Rachel person. Anyone else notice that she didnt answer the question. Hmmmmmm Rachel, whats that about? :winkok:

I Just legit choked on my food when i saw that!!! Ahh well , Maybe she isnt like those girls from our neck of the woods?

[D-Dogg]

Now you see Jeff must of not hit the puberty because if he aint emptying his sack willingly then the wet dream would of got him by now so i think this guy is just a late comer (laughs to self at the irony of that last comment :D ) as for whether i do it myself or not let's see i'm 16, i'm surrounded by hotties most of the time, i spend alot of my time on the internet.......what do you think :rolleyes: also i'm a religious guy and i want to know where does it say it's bad to masterbate? thats a new one on me so if someone could clarify that i would be happy

[Funk]

"thou shall not masturbate, it is too fun, I am a stuck up dude that see you where ever you go, also I like to bother you and make you want to kill your children."

and the famous someolddude 3:17-1292

"I hate when you have fun, no wanking off"

and

"Everytime you masturbate, I shall eat a kitten"
all of them true :p

[Gravedigger]

also i'm a religious guy and i want to know where does it say it's bad to masterbate? thats a new one on me so if someone could clarify that i would be happy
Masturbation stems from lustful thoughts. To lust after someone is a real big sin. However, if the person you lust after is imaginary, then you're not really lusting after an actual person until you put a face on them. Some people are wondering what I mean by an imaginary woman...well, if you really think about it, you'll get what I mean.

Then again, the whole imaginary woman part is more like a loophole and Bible loopholes are probably sins, too. So, in other words, you shouldn't do anything sexual outside of marriage. And no, kissing and hugging aren't fine because more than likely if you're hugging a girl (as in a girlfriend) there's lustful thoughts about her somewhere in your head.

So...yeah, Jeff, even if you never have actually masturbated, if you've looked at a girl and thought "those kinds of thoughts" about her, then you're committing sins just as bad as someone who masturbates.

[Sunshine]

are you Christian? Or do you just know a lot of stuff about the Bible?

[Wilse]

A Christian usually knows a lot about the bible :p

[The Chick]

Hell yes, I masterbate.

[Gravedigger]

are you Christian? Or do you just know a lot of stuff about the Bible?
Yes, I'm a Christian.

[The Pez]

This thread is still going? My goodness! Since I never officially answered the question....yes I do masterbate. I mean, how could you not?! Haven't you ever seen the movie 40 Days & 40 Nights?! Bad **** happens when you don't masterbate or have sex!!!

Jeff, I don't know what the big deal is. I mean, it's perfectly natural to do it.

[JustinCredible]

heh, interesting topic...I am guessing the Guest "The Chick" is somone here...cuz someone said "do any s reply" ha...not comfortable saying...because it is personal, not to be shared with people you dont know personally

[Wilse]

"The Chick" is not a chick as in woman, it's a chicken, one by the Name of Andrew that comes from South Carolina. The Reason for calling him a chicken is for the mods and him to know.....

[Jeff HBK Hardy V.2]

Well as for the puberty thing lets just say I've grown an Afro in all places possible. :cool:

I can send you some if you want King, I'm sure you'd like that.

GD I have thought 'thoughts' about a girl and I try not too anymore, I also pray for forgiveness. Feel free to interperet me anyway you feel because I know I ain't like that.

Shua, I just find it really, really gross. I respect all you people who do thats cool but for me I just get a sick feeling.

Lets put it this way, if everyone was jumping off cliffs I wouldn't do it.

[Peoples King]

A gay joke. How innovative of you. Can you smell the sarcasm? Hang on, Im having another thought......... Your not a unic...... are you?

[Jeff HBK Hardy V.2]

Unic??? I think I know what that means, I have a penis, I'm not a transvestite and no I don't like aquariums.

That covered all the meanings I think.

Gay joke? I just asked if you wanted some of my.......puberty [/end goldust impersonation]

[Peoples King]

No Im fine thanks. Plus how do I know that it is your fluff Im getting and not some poor soul that you attacked down some dark alley with a scissors?

[Jeff HBK Hardy V.2]

????Thats a good question.

Ummm I could take a picture or you could go to a lab and check the DNA on it and match with mine.

[Peoples King]

Or you could just keep that fluff where it belongs and not bring it out to play. Plus if the post office opened it.......... well someone would have gotten an unpleasent suprise. Either that or they'd think the interior design world has gone mad......... Hmm, pubes on walls. I like it!

[Gravedigger]

GD I have thought 'thoughts' about a girl and I try not too anymore, I also pray for forgiveness. Feel free to interperet me anyway you feel because I know I ain't like that.
Ok, man, whatever. I don't believe that about someone your age, but you keep telling everyone that and one day we might believe ya. :winkok:

But with you talking about being religious and everything, I kinda find it funny that you're going around judging people by asking if they masterbate. Because whether or not that was your intention, that's what you're doing and you can't deny it.

[Peoples King]

Unless of course Jeff is a catholic priest who has had private sessions with alter boys. If that were the case then this thread makes perfect sense, GD.

[wwechick1982]

Thank you Gary. You appreciate true art when you see it. Unlike that Rachel person. Anyone else notice that she didnt answer the question. Hmmmmmm Rachel, whats that about? :winkok:

You want an answer to that question, hmmmmm? Well the answer is no, I have better things to do with my time! For some reason, it seems only teenage boys that know they'll never get with a woman do that!

~Rachel

[JustinCredible]

Unless of course Jeff is a catholic priest who has had private sessions with alter boys. If that were the case then this thread makes perfect sense, GD.

could be a good time to break out the sparkle gloves...the Michael Jackson gloves...duel...to the you too

hey, Jeff does have a thing in common with MJ, the afro...in all places... :winkok:

or he used to have one :)

[Funk]

Self improvement is masturbation.

An easy solution to all christians, wank off, confess, wank off again... Finding loopholes is so fun!

[Gravedigger]

You want an answer to that question, hmmmmm? Well the answer is no, I have better things to do with my time! For some reason, it seems only teenage boys that know they'll never get with a woman do that!

~Rachel
not true. I know guys who have admitted before in front of their girlfriends who they are sexually active with that they do it when the g/f isn't around..

And if you think that's why teenage boys do it...then why do you think teenage girls do it? I'm sure that even the super popular good-looking teenage females masterbate on occasion.

[wwechick1982]

Well from experience in my town, the girls did it all the time, because they were "skanky". The guys(which were mostly the teenager!) who did do it, everyone thought were cool, so I pose the question, more than just arguing with you Kool Aid,": Why is it when guys do it, it's cool, but when a girl does it, it's just gross?!" That's what I'd like to know.

~Rachel

BTW, I was speaking sarcastically, but I guess it didn't come across that way. But, I won't apologize for it either!

[Gravedigger]

Well from experience in my town, the girls did it all the time, because they were "skanky". The guys(which were mostly the teenager!) who did do it, everyone thought were cool, so I pose the question, more than just arguing with you Kool Aid,": Why is it when guys do it, it's cool, but when a girl does it, it's just gross?!" That's what I'd like to know.

~Rachel

BTW, I was speaking sarcastically, but I guess it didn't come across that way. But, I won't apologize for it either!
lol...cool? I've NEVER heard it thought of that way. Around here if a girl admits to doing it, guys are amazed but if another guy does it's either ewww, too much information or uh...yeah whatever.

Honestly, I thought guys never thought anything bad about the subject but girls think that masterbation is nasty but that's usually because a lot of girls are embarrassed to discuss things like that. So, seeing as how guys and girls aren't like that around here compared to your town, I can't really answer your question.

[Roland]

Hmmmmmmmm, Since we are being Christ like in this thread, I figure since you are a Christian, do you think Christ ever would ask a bunch of people do they masturbate. Before you write or say things as Christian you should at least think Does God want me to Start a topic like this or would Christ ever think about starting a topic like this.

[wwechick1982]

Well, then Roland you tell us?
Jerk! :(

[Epitaph]

":Why is it when guys do it, it's cool, but when a girl does it, it's just gross?!" That's what I'd like to know.

I Aint ever thought of it like that either. But isn't it a natural part of life for every one to try it?

[Roland]

Well, then Roland you tell us?
Jerk! :(

Well if asking a question makes me a Jerk then I just want post here in the chatter box forum. I just wanted a few questions answered from the guy who started this topic

[Peoples King]

Good one Rach. But then again, teenage boys always have the oppertunity to pop down to the docks and get a............ never mind.

[Superman33]

Let me say this. When I get married, and my wife is pregnant, that's nine months with no sex. So within that nine months I'm gettin' jacked off whether I do it myself or she does it for me.

[JustinCredible]

anyway...just to add on to what i said...i said strangers, peeps here are people i have gotten to know pretty well...i have talked to most people here...

yes, yes i do...

[spiderman_rules]

Supes you can still bang pregnant chicks but probably wouldn't be the same

But I of course do, and I doo it often:)

[Chazz]

Well, most of the guys I know don't think it is nasty for a girl to say she masterbates. In fact, it can be a turn on. Look, I'll admit that I was shocked to see a thread on here about masterbating. But in all honesty, anyone who says they have not done it (be it male or female) is a flat out liar.

[Gravedigger]

Let me say this. When I get married, and my wife is pregnant, that's nine months with no sex. So within that nine months I'm gettin' jacked off whether I do it myself or she does it for me.
Most guys I know who have pregnant wives or girlfriends say that's when sex is the best with a female.

[Funk]

no **** sherlock!

Whats better a steamy hot and tight hole or a cold and britle hand?

[.:KnoX:.]

What a thread. Why on earth would anyone want to know if others pull their snake on a regular basis?

/me gets lubricant

[Peoples King]

Simple Knox. We arent talking to Jeff we are talking Father Murphy the dirty priest. He is carrying out a survey for the "church." Or he is just a filthy old man.

Another thought would be that Jeffy finds the subject hilarious and giggles to himself with every reply. At this stage he may have wet himself. Jeff you wet yourself?

[.:KnoX:.]

This one goes out to Jeff

*http://www.tribeclown.com/Clownitems/opti.swf*

oh and:

*http://www.tribeclown.com/Clownitems/Petnames.mp3*

[MikeD]

Well, any red-blooded male has a turn with the crank every now and then. Chazz, you are correct when you say anyone who doesn't is a liar. C'mon now, men are hardwired to get the batter of the brain and if suitable female companionship is not available, its the next best thing. Anyways, you don't have to cuddle with your hand when its all over.......

[Superman33]

Well, any red-blooded male has a turn with the crank every now and then.
LMAO!!!!!!! Greatest reference of masturbation EVER!!!!

[D-Dogg]

Anyways, you don't have to cuddle with your hand when its all over.......

LOL very true also your hand doesn't get offended if you say to it "i think you need a wash first alryte" whereas females feel the need to slap you i mean whats that about :confused:

[Peoples King]

My hand slaps me whenever I try to give it little pointers. Gets mouldy odd with me.

[.:KnoX:.]

My left one gets offended because I prefer the right. How odd...

[Peoples King]

Knox this is what I do. I normally have my hands on rotation, keeps them both happy and me as a matter fact. Ever tried it with two? I must try that sometime

[iamthatdamgood123]

Knox this is what I do. I normally have my hands on rotation, keeps them both happy and me as a matter fact. Ever tried it with two? I must try that sometime

King, you kinda need to have a big **** to use both hands ;)

[MikeD]

Right before bedtime, its the ultimate sleeping pill.

[Funk]

phhh, two hands is nothing, up here in canada, eh, we use both of 'em, eh, and a couple of beavers to fill in the empty spots, eh. :d

[Sunshine]

Right before bedtime, its the ultimate sleeping pill.


Weird..it gets ME hyper!

[Ray Williams]

Boys go get yourselves some ladies. No one really needs to know if you beat it or not. You are all getting freaky. LOL

[Lover Nuts]

Hell I'll admit it, I do masterbate if I am watching some pornon and that sort of ****.

*Pulls out Stacy Keibler magazine from under bed*

[Superman33]

Boys go get yourselves some ladies. No one really needs to know if you beat it or not. You are all getting freaky. LOLGet the bug out of your ass, everyones just having a little fun.

[MikeD]

Boys go get yourselves some ladies. No one really needs to know if you beat it or not. You are all getting freaky. LOL

Well sir...I have a wife, I get it everyday, and I still play with the one eyed pork sword every chance I get...maybe I have a problem(too much batter on the brain). Don't be ashamed...YOU DO IT TOO!!!! \====0 :eek:

[Superman33]

LMAO!!!!! One eyed pord sword!!!!

[Cody Longpre]

Boys go get yourselves some ladies. No one really needs to know if you beat it or not. You are all getting freaky. LOL

Its all fun!

I'll admit! I do! Not all the freakin' time, but I do! Every guy does!

There are two types of liars in masturbation. those who say they've done it once and didn't like it. And those who say that they haven't.

[The_Wolf]

I bet 20quid that he was pulling the chicken while making this post.

i 2nd that, this guy doesnt have the guts too admit it

[Ray Williams]

I never said I don't do it, actually it is one of my favourite past times (lol) I just don't think we need a thread to talk about it, that's all.