Spaz
10-13-2008, 04:49 AM
Sunday Night Live, brought to you by Microsoft.
This is Bill Gates, beaming into your brain. I was stopped by a small poverty ridden child on the street. Well, more like he was laying in the middle of the road, and my driver wouldn't drive him over. So I stepped out of the back of my limo and walked over to the child, who said he would not leave until I attended a show with him. I don't know why he thought that would do anything, because I'm Bill freakin' Gates. But he outlasted me, and I agreed to go along. We got to the rundown place, and I thought the kid's mom was singing or something, I don't know, I was on my cell phone, while my driver bought the tickets. Once we got inside, there was a wrestling ring in the middle of a bunch of people. The people were separated by a metal barrier, which I'm pretty sure I saw duct tape holding together. So this small child led me to my "seat" if you could even call a seat, it was a metal folding chair. Quickly, I got on the phone and had a very comfy throne beamed in. Sure, when it got there, it landed on some peasent, but I didn't care, I pulled 100 bucks from my pocket and placed it in his hand, which was the only part still sticking out from under the throne. Anyways after what seemed to be an eternity of waiting, the show finally took off.
Ryuu Tsukigami vs. T-dog
I don't know who these two were, they annoyed me though, they kept girly slapping eachother. I yawned, got bored and then opened my cellphone. A few minutes later, Master Chief ran through the "crowd" and jumped into the ring. He beat both of them down with the gravity hammer(which I invented), and then pinned them both after 3.45, I know that because my watch was going.
Winner: Master Chief by technical melting in 3:45
After that borefest, Master Chief came over and pulled a battle rifle and stood guard over me. Everyone, except for this annoying kid, gave me space of about a five foot diamter. I loved it, I could breath without tasting beer. Anyways, the next two people came out, so I figured, I was in this for the long haul, or until I had Master Chief run in and kill them all.
Blade Lavigne vs. Mike "The Saint" Corral
These two guys were boring, the one guy, I think his name was Blade. What a stupid name. I mean, it's not as cool as Bill, or William, but no mind, he was wearing some sort of MC Hammer pants. He finished the match early with a Sit Down Powerbomb, I only know the name of that because the moron kept yelling it. Corral tried to do some flippity stuff from the top rope, but Blade, seriously, Blade?, caught him, and powerbombed him... like I said, in about :52 seconds. Corral was led out of the ring by a couple of ringworkers. Blade posed, doing the Thriller dance, it was horrible.
Winner: Blade Lavigne by pinfall in :52
A guy got a little too close and Master Chief dragged him out, so I was without bodyguard for this next match, but it was ok, I'll have to tell you why once it's over, well, at least how I saw it to be over.
The One vs. The Main Man
These two guys were impressive looking, I mean, they weren't me or anything, but the "One" fellow, reminded me of a younger version of me. They got in the ring and started brawling. I was getting into it until about 4:50 passed. Before I could open my phone and call someone to end it, three men came out of the crowd. All of them sporting a shirt with the initials "THF" I got scared, thinking they were going to take my money, so I got up, and hid behind my throne. I poked my head out enough to see the "THF" people, one with a beard, sharing a beer with the one called... One. The other two were performing some sort of finisher on the one called Main Man. The shorter of the two, I think his name was AFS, or at least that was on the back of the shirt, smacked Main Man with a large purple dildo, I laughed, the kid laughed, and everyone did. As soon as the bearded one finished drinking the beer, he smashed the can over the "One's" head, then all three of them pinned the two guys, the ref's finally just counted.
Winner: Team Hamma Fist by dual pinfall in 5:30
I sat back in my throne and the three men came over and introduced themselves to me. A man named AFS (weird name), a man they called "J-Lo" (he was the bearded one), and one they called Ric, no catchy nickname, just Ric. I gave them money for finishing the "match" so I could move on with my night. Master Chief came back about that time and Team Hamma Fist left. More music hit, so I guess another match was starting.
Beno vs. Spaz
This was a battle of the four letter names! w00t for those. Anyways, this Beno fellow came out with his "Yo Yo Yo" nonsense. The Spaz guy came out, but was completely drunk and rolled down the entryway. It was embarassing to say the least. The referee wouldn't even let him into the ring. Beno came out and knocked the Spaz character in the head and pinned him on the ground. The bell never rang, but the ref gave the win to Beno anyways.
Winner: Beno by pinfall in -:12
After that, the Beno character came over and tried to "Yo Yo Yo" me, to which Master Chief responded by dragging Beno outside of the "arena". The kid looked sad, because the Spaz character was his favorite. So I threw a little money the kid's way and he went and bought a Spaz shirt. This last match was quite horrible to say the least. It was a couple of "special" people going against a couple of impoverished guys.
Innovators of Wrestling (Chris Cage & Jeremiah Ranks) vs. The John Shock Association (Johnny Tapia & Shockmaster)
The IoW came out and got into the ring. Chris Cage started talking smack to the ring audience. Talking about something called PCW. For half the match I thought he was talking about PMS, but who knows. The kid enlightened me to what PCW was. I just shrugged, the two "special" guys came out, I don't know about them, but one of them was wearing a sparkling Stormtrooper helmet, so I figured the two were lovers. Chris Cage superkicked both of them when they got into the ring. As the Shockmaster was falling, he heaved his helmet and hit Ranks right in the face. Ranks took it so hard in the face that he fell out of the ring. The Shockmaster covered his face and grabbed his helmet, just in time to be hit with Cage's finisher. Everyone was cheering so I don't know the name, the kid's voice just wouldn't carry over the cheering. Cage finally pinned both men at once.
Winner: Innovators of Wrestling (Chris Cage & Jeremiah Ranks) by pinfall in 3:20
After the match ended, the Spaz character got up and stumbled to the back. I had my throne and myself Statflighted out. It was fun. But anyways, this show was bland and lame, so I plugged in the Xbox and started playing Halo 3. I'm so awesome.
Jesus H Chri... I mean William H. Gates!
Beaming up!
|There you go, Live for this week, I can't say anything about a lack of rps, since I, myself, missed my own deadline. Stupid flu... anyways, review, don't review, up to you!|
This is Bill Gates, beaming into your brain. I was stopped by a small poverty ridden child on the street. Well, more like he was laying in the middle of the road, and my driver wouldn't drive him over. So I stepped out of the back of my limo and walked over to the child, who said he would not leave until I attended a show with him. I don't know why he thought that would do anything, because I'm Bill freakin' Gates. But he outlasted me, and I agreed to go along. We got to the rundown place, and I thought the kid's mom was singing or something, I don't know, I was on my cell phone, while my driver bought the tickets. Once we got inside, there was a wrestling ring in the middle of a bunch of people. The people were separated by a metal barrier, which I'm pretty sure I saw duct tape holding together. So this small child led me to my "seat" if you could even call a seat, it was a metal folding chair. Quickly, I got on the phone and had a very comfy throne beamed in. Sure, when it got there, it landed on some peasent, but I didn't care, I pulled 100 bucks from my pocket and placed it in his hand, which was the only part still sticking out from under the throne. Anyways after what seemed to be an eternity of waiting, the show finally took off.
Ryuu Tsukigami vs. T-dog
I don't know who these two were, they annoyed me though, they kept girly slapping eachother. I yawned, got bored and then opened my cellphone. A few minutes later, Master Chief ran through the "crowd" and jumped into the ring. He beat both of them down with the gravity hammer(which I invented), and then pinned them both after 3.45, I know that because my watch was going.
Winner: Master Chief by technical melting in 3:45
After that borefest, Master Chief came over and pulled a battle rifle and stood guard over me. Everyone, except for this annoying kid, gave me space of about a five foot diamter. I loved it, I could breath without tasting beer. Anyways, the next two people came out, so I figured, I was in this for the long haul, or until I had Master Chief run in and kill them all.
Blade Lavigne vs. Mike "The Saint" Corral
These two guys were boring, the one guy, I think his name was Blade. What a stupid name. I mean, it's not as cool as Bill, or William, but no mind, he was wearing some sort of MC Hammer pants. He finished the match early with a Sit Down Powerbomb, I only know the name of that because the moron kept yelling it. Corral tried to do some flippity stuff from the top rope, but Blade, seriously, Blade?, caught him, and powerbombed him... like I said, in about :52 seconds. Corral was led out of the ring by a couple of ringworkers. Blade posed, doing the Thriller dance, it was horrible.
Winner: Blade Lavigne by pinfall in :52
A guy got a little too close and Master Chief dragged him out, so I was without bodyguard for this next match, but it was ok, I'll have to tell you why once it's over, well, at least how I saw it to be over.
The One vs. The Main Man
These two guys were impressive looking, I mean, they weren't me or anything, but the "One" fellow, reminded me of a younger version of me. They got in the ring and started brawling. I was getting into it until about 4:50 passed. Before I could open my phone and call someone to end it, three men came out of the crowd. All of them sporting a shirt with the initials "THF" I got scared, thinking they were going to take my money, so I got up, and hid behind my throne. I poked my head out enough to see the "THF" people, one with a beard, sharing a beer with the one called... One. The other two were performing some sort of finisher on the one called Main Man. The shorter of the two, I think his name was AFS, or at least that was on the back of the shirt, smacked Main Man with a large purple dildo, I laughed, the kid laughed, and everyone did. As soon as the bearded one finished drinking the beer, he smashed the can over the "One's" head, then all three of them pinned the two guys, the ref's finally just counted.
Winner: Team Hamma Fist by dual pinfall in 5:30
I sat back in my throne and the three men came over and introduced themselves to me. A man named AFS (weird name), a man they called "J-Lo" (he was the bearded one), and one they called Ric, no catchy nickname, just Ric. I gave them money for finishing the "match" so I could move on with my night. Master Chief came back about that time and Team Hamma Fist left. More music hit, so I guess another match was starting.
Beno vs. Spaz
This was a battle of the four letter names! w00t for those. Anyways, this Beno fellow came out with his "Yo Yo Yo" nonsense. The Spaz guy came out, but was completely drunk and rolled down the entryway. It was embarassing to say the least. The referee wouldn't even let him into the ring. Beno came out and knocked the Spaz character in the head and pinned him on the ground. The bell never rang, but the ref gave the win to Beno anyways.
Winner: Beno by pinfall in -:12
After that, the Beno character came over and tried to "Yo Yo Yo" me, to which Master Chief responded by dragging Beno outside of the "arena". The kid looked sad, because the Spaz character was his favorite. So I threw a little money the kid's way and he went and bought a Spaz shirt. This last match was quite horrible to say the least. It was a couple of "special" people going against a couple of impoverished guys.
Innovators of Wrestling (Chris Cage & Jeremiah Ranks) vs. The John Shock Association (Johnny Tapia & Shockmaster)
The IoW came out and got into the ring. Chris Cage started talking smack to the ring audience. Talking about something called PCW. For half the match I thought he was talking about PMS, but who knows. The kid enlightened me to what PCW was. I just shrugged, the two "special" guys came out, I don't know about them, but one of them was wearing a sparkling Stormtrooper helmet, so I figured the two were lovers. Chris Cage superkicked both of them when they got into the ring. As the Shockmaster was falling, he heaved his helmet and hit Ranks right in the face. Ranks took it so hard in the face that he fell out of the ring. The Shockmaster covered his face and grabbed his helmet, just in time to be hit with Cage's finisher. Everyone was cheering so I don't know the name, the kid's voice just wouldn't carry over the cheering. Cage finally pinned both men at once.
Winner: Innovators of Wrestling (Chris Cage & Jeremiah Ranks) by pinfall in 3:20
After the match ended, the Spaz character got up and stumbled to the back. I had my throne and myself Statflighted out. It was fun. But anyways, this show was bland and lame, so I plugged in the Xbox and started playing Halo 3. I'm so awesome.
Jesus H Chri... I mean William H. Gates!
Beaming up!
|There you go, Live for this week, I can't say anything about a lack of rps, since I, myself, missed my own deadline. Stupid flu... anyways, review, don't review, up to you!|